28 Ridiculous Products People Actually Buy For Their Kids

I recently had my first child, and it has opened my eyes to the magical world of baby products. You definitely need a lot of new things when having a baby, but some products out there are kind of crazy, and you should probably not waste your money.

The iPotty

Source: ecx.images-amazon.com

I could actually see this succeeding as an adult product, but it's probably not necessary for a toddler.

Ride on vacuum

Source: redhousedesign.com

The Crib Dribbler

Source: amazon.com

Feed your baby like that pet rat you always wanted. OK this isn't a real product, but you can buy this prank box to give one of the other ridiculous items to an expecting mother.

Onesie with built-in mop

Source: justsomething.co

When you want to make your child earn their food by doing chores.

"It's a Boy!" Card

Source: ivilliage.com

Laugh and Learn Apptivity Case

Source: geeklany.wpress.hu

Do babies really need iPhones this badly?

NoseFrida the Snotsucker

Source: wordpress.com

The snot sucking tube really grosses me out, especially the strange noise it makes. A tissue works just fine for me.

The Peekaru

Source: gizmodo.com

This baby snuggie will make you look like you have an alien inside you.

Zacky Hand Pillow

Source: thegreenhead.com

This creepy hand pillow is for when you don’t want to touch your baby anymore, but don’t want him or her to notice you’ve left.

Grillz Pacifier

Source: blogspot.com

Redneck Pacifier

Source: lilligren.com

The Crying "Analyzer"

Source: gadgetsformothers.com

This seems like the best scam ever. I only wish I thought of it first.

Baby’s Poop Alarm

Source: stayathomemompreneur.com

This device can alert you of a dirty diaper the moment it happens by sensing humidity, odor, and temperature changes. Just changing the baby regularly throughout the day isn’t that hard.

Crumb Cap

Source: crumbcap.com

If you are worried about a messy baby, you shouldn’t have had a baby.

The Baby Lasso

Source: babylasso.com

The Daddle

Source: daddle.com

By the time you get this on, you child will have probably moved on to something else.

The Kickbee

Source: kickbee.net

This motion-sensing belt sends a tweet on behalf of your baby every time a kick is detected. I don’t think even my closest friends or family would want that many updates, much less, the entire world.

The Windi gas relievers (aka baby butt plugs)

Source: toysrus.com

From the same company that brought you the Snotsucker comes these gas relieving butt plug things??

Baby Toupee

Source: babytoupee.com

Placenta Brooch (for easy storage of your placenta)

Source: etsy.com

The Thudguard

Source: toysrus.com

Kids bump their heads and get over it. It’s how they learn to be more careful. Don’t protect them from learning.

Snazzy Baby Knee Pads

Source: babeaze.com.au

With this and the Thudguard, you might as well just put your baby in a bubble.

Baby high heels

Source: ecx.images-amazon.com

Babies don’t even walk yet so regular shoes aren’t even really needed, but high heels are just insane.

Pee-Pee Teepees

Source: ecx.images-amazon.com

You are supposed to use these to cover up your boy’s junk during diaper changes to stop any accidents. I may have a girl but can still tell you babies move way too much for these things to stay on.

Baby Butt Fan

Source: onsugar.com

Drying your baby’s butt before putting a diaper back on can help reduce diaper rashes. I just use the diaper I’m about to put on as a fan.

Tummy Tub

Source: mom4life.com

This tub (i.e., expensive bucket) is womb-shaped and that is supposed to ease the baby’s transition into the world. Just buy a regular bucket if that’s what you want.

The bottle holder

Source: baolaichau.vn

Inspired by the beer holders we see at every NFL game, this product is great when you are just sick of caring for your child.

Baby Bangs

Source: blogspot.com

Just wait and their hair will grow soon enough. That’s how it works.

We've survived this long without giving our babies touchscreens, we can (and should) probably go longer.

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