"My Boyfriend Is Using My Birthday Gift With Another Woman" — Folks Are Divided Over Who's Wrong
"It feels like he’s putting another woman’s feelings over mine."
Published April 30 2024, 2:37 p.m. ET
Remember the famous "We were on a break!" episode of Friends? Well, this is kind of like that.
On Mumsnet, a woman said that her boyfriend was using her birthday gift — i.e., tickets he bought for her favorite musical — with another woman.
While that might sound outrageous at first, keep in mind that these two were on a break! for a short period of time.
And it was during this break that the boyfriend — who had bought the tickets while they were still together — offered up his extra ticket to a female friend. You know, because they were on a break!
But now that they're back together, why is he still committed to taking the other woman to the show? Who's in the wrong here? Let's get into it...
"It feels like he’s putting another woman’s feelings over mine."
In her post on Mumsnet, the woman (we'll call her Penny) explained that her boyfriend had bought two tickets for them to go see her favorite musical for her birthday.
But, in between the time he purchased the tickets and the time of the musical, Penny and her man had called it quits for six weeks.
The two eventually got back together, and while Penny was expecting to see the musical (and had already organized childcare so that she could have the night out), her boyfriend told her he'd already offered up her ticket.
"As he couldn't get a refund, he asked friends — and [he] is now taking a female friend instead," Penny wrote. "I vaguely know of her."
"[Am I being unreasonable] in thinking that as the tickets were my main birthday gift, he should either have given me both to use or cancel taking the woman and take me, as they were part of my gift and we are back together?" Penny asked her fellow Mumsnet users.
"He says she helped him out by agreeing to come so doesn’t want to change her plans," Penny went on, "but if I were her I’d be happy to stand down as it was a special gift for us to enjoy together; it feels like he’s putting another woman’s feelings over mine."
Not everyone agrees on who is in the wrong here.
Some folks in the comments were immediately baffled that the boyfriend would even think to take this other woman to the musical.
"WTAF. I’m laughing at him. Of course he can’t go with her! Has he lost his mind?" one commenter wrote.
"Why are you sticking around with this waste of space? Stay broken up," another insisted.
However, some people didn't think the situation was so cut-and-dried.
"... I don't think he's in the wrong. You had broken up, he invited his friend. I think it actually shows he's a nice person not ditching his mate to take you now you're back together," one person commented.
"You broke up, he invited someone else. He's not in the wrong. Maybe not be so childish to be on/off with your boyfriend?" someone else wrote.
And others think there could've been a happy medium.
"The friend might have already organized a day off work/childcare/travel etc. Your bf is in a no-win situation but he could have avoided this by letting you keep the tickets when you broke up," someone wrote.
Another person suggested: "If he doesn't want to let her down then you take his ticket and go with her instead."
What do you think? Does Penny have every right to be angry about this? Should she totally just go to the show with the other woman and tell her boyfriend to kick rocks? That could be a nice ending!