“Let’s Move On” — Woman Shocked at Project Manager’s Callous Response to Coworker’s Death

A woman was astounded by the heartless response from her project manager after a coworker died. Anna (@annamoylanchi) posted a viral TikTok sharing how the news of their death was announced to her work team during a call. However, she stated that they were barely given any time to process this information before everyone went right back to work mode.

"I was just on a call and a person on the call goes I need to just say something quickly at the end," she says at the top of the video, looking into the camera.

Anna then begins the speak, stops herself, and then continues. "I'm trying not to laugh. She goes, I would like to share that someone on the team like, that we work with, has just passed."

The immediate reaction to the news on the call was met with silence from the team. "And it was like really quiet on the call, and everyone's like really sad, obviously. And then, it was quiet for one second, the project manager goes, okay so now let's move on with like the action items."

Anna begins laughing, presumably at the heartless absurdity of the project manager she just witnessed. "Sorry I can't help but laugh, but she was like, OK so ... let's make sure your action items' figured out and then like let me know if anyone else needs anything."

The TikToker couldn't believe the brazen lack of care displayed by the project manager during the work conference call. "Someone has passed and they literally gave a minute of, a second of silence and was like back to work. On that note I'm taking a long lunch," she says as she begins to walk outside, tall buildings behind her.

The video then cuts out.

There have been other instances where folks have hopped on social media to describe similar workplace circumstances where they've heard news of a co-worker's passing. During this call, the TikToker who discussed the incident stated that akin to Anna's situation, her co-workers also refused to discuss the co-worker's job at length.

Instead, much of the worry was focused on whoever was going to take care of their workload in the absence of the person's existence.

Sadly, this type of attitude may seem like a normalized response to someone's death in the workplace, given the "show must go on" nature of business.

Some may find it even more troubling that our species has become so desensitized to each other that guides and thought pieces need to be published to adequately inform others on how to have more of a heart in these types of situations. Harvard Business Review published an article on how to work "through the death of a colleague."

This piece isn't an itemized checklist of what managers need to say or do in these types of situations, however, but almost acts like a memorial for the author's own departed coworker. They write in the piece, "Coping with a colleague’s death is not something we’re coached on in leadership trainings or company handbooks."

The author continued: "Can you ever be prepared for getting the call telling you your colleague is gone? For sharing the news with your entire staff? For cleaning out their desk, full of handwritten notes and personal reminders of your friend?"

She did list some helpful pointers that folks who are working with a team that has a member who passed, as well. First, she suggests that folks are upfront and "authentic" with their respective team members. Upon hearing the news, she alerted other members of her team and wrote that they took time to grieve together over the passing.

The author also mentioned that she willfully expressed her grief in front of her co-workers when announcing the team member's passing. "We often feel pressure to remain poised and in control when things fall apart, but sometimes we need to display vulnerability, not composure."

She added, "Hold a space for your staff to express their emotions freely. By showing them that there is no shame in authentic emotion, you’re giving them a platform to experience their own processes of grieving."

Additionally, she recommended communicating grief in clear tones, and that honoring the co-worker's memory in the workplace after her passing was a vital part of the grieving process.

One TikToker who responded to Anna's video stated that they followed steps similar to the aforementioned ones in the Harvard Business Review piece.

"We lost a coworker very suddenly and management did a company-wide call (to just inform us), closed the office for the day, brought in grief counselors, and then sponsored a charity walk for his cause of death. And I felt like THAT was the bare minimum," they wrote.

However, others replied that they don't have much faith in their respective workplaces to show the same type of humanity to employees when they pass on. As a result, it's affected their attitudes towards their jobs. "And this is why I don’t go above and beyond for no company," one replied.

Another said that after their colleague died, a manager used that as an inspirational speech for everyone to work harder. "My coworker passed suddenly totally unexpectedly, a unique absolutely beloved man, and my SVP said '[coworker] loved this company so we should work extra passionately in his memory.' It was psychotic."