Please Do Not Wear These Cringe-Worthy Halloween Costumes This Year
Updated Sept. 29 2020, 3:44 p.m. ET
The world is full of so many horrors right now that we do not need you to add to it with truly cringe-worthy, terrible Halloween costumes this year. I'm telling you we don't need any sexy Carole Baskins or "clever" coronavirus getup. No one wants it! If you are going to dress up this year, consider things like a Masked Care Bear or a Masked Puppy Dog or a Masked Giant Mask... You get the point. Here are a bunch of cringe-worthy costumes we should all avoid this year.
Coronavirus
No! Stop it! The coronavirus is not a joke. It's not a cute, punny costume. It's a terrible global tragedy! No one wants to see this. I promise.
Tiger Queen
Remember way back at the beginning of quarantine when we all watched Tiger King? Barely? Yeah, me too. That was so seven months ago. Too much has happened since then. Practically no one even remembers what Tiger King was actually about. It's officially time to move on.
Hashtag
This costume has big Jim-from-The-Office energy, but like, less cute. If you're dressing up as a hashtag in 2020, I'm sorry, I can't help you.
Nuclear Destruction Costume
If you wear this nuclear destruction costume in 2020, you will make people panic wherever you go. Either that or people will just think that you're extremely cautious about the coronavirus.
JoJo Siwa
It's just weird to dress up as a teenage girl who's like, not a character and exists today. It just is! I'm sorry, but I'm also very not sorry.
Very Cool Vampire
I really hate to burst your bubble, but this "very cool" vampire is...the opposite of very cool. Cool vampires don't wear dad jeans. This just looks like a regular vampire costume that forgot the pants.
Don McDreadful
Ronald McDonald is scary enough as it is; you don't have to make him any more demonic. In fact, somehow "Don McDreadful" is way less scary than the real Ronald. I don't know how they did it, but they did.
Tater Thot
A tater thot. TATER THOT. Not going to lie, this is kind of great. But it gets the cringe-worthy classification because it's not so much a costume as it is a tight dress with a bunch of tater tots on it that says Tater Thot. It is certainly a look.
Terrifying Cookie Monster
I have so many questions. First, where do you get this? Second, why do you get this? Third, how does he drink that beer? Is there a hole in the mouth? Good luck sleeping tonight with this American Horror Story: Cookie Monster costume haunting your nightmares.
Guppy Goldberg
The glamorousness of the dress just doesn't square with the silliness of the goldfish hood. I'm sorry. I also don't understand why it's called Guppy Goldberg. Is the fish Jewish? Is it based on an existing character? It's just a weird one, folks!
Bag of weed
If you're going to dress up like a bag of weed for Halloween, you have to prepare yourself for a lot of questions from Grandma. Let's hope she buys the idea that you just really like bags of freshly mowed grass.
Free Bird King
I'm sorry; this is just ridiculous. I don't know if this is supposed to be some existing character, but "Free Bird King" definitely doesn't do it justice. I will say, if you're looking to go as Moira Rose from The Crows Have Eyes III: The Crowening, this might be your best option.
Combover Leader
I just absolutely love when knock-off Halloween costumes can't say what the costume actually is so they use the most awkward descriptive words ever. Ah yes, the "Combover Leader" wig. Whoever could that be? And whoever would want to be caught sporting that hairstyle?