Dad Doesn't Like Being Called a "House Husband," Wife Blames Misogyny — Who's Right Here?

Over on Reddit, a man posed a question to other users on the popular social media website: "[Am I the a------] for telling my wife I don't care about my 'internalized misogyny?'"

In his post post — which was was originally uploaded to "Am I the A------?" (AITA) subreddit, but was later rescued/posted on the "Am I the Angel?" sub — he detailed how his wife came to accuse him of being a misogynist, and it all has to do with the nature of his work setup.

According to OP, the way his job works is that he can "condense all [of it] into 20 small periods," which then leaves him "free for the rest of the year."

He took advantage of this set up in order to stay home with his toddler, enjoying finger painting and how "entertaining as f---" little kids can be.

At the time he uploaded the Reddit post, he mentioned that he'd gotten to stay home for an entire month due to the nature of his work.

The man would go on to preface that he doesn't think there's anything particularly wrong about "being a house-husband/wife" but that he technically isn't one because he earns the majority of the money for the household and he does, in fact, have a corporate job.

OP noted that his wife works full-time, but her schedule is more typical of the "normal and steady/9-5 type."

... Which may have prompted her to begin calling him "her househusband."

He apparently informed her that he didn't necessarily appreciate being called that; however, she clapped back stating that it was just a joke.

And while the Reddit user couldn't really pin down why he didn't like the name, he says he asked his wife to stop doing it, but that she then flipped the request on him by stating that his gripe must be with homemakers. He said this wasn't the case.

"She told me the only reason I was uncomfortable with being called that was that I must not respect the role of a homemaker. I told her this wasn't true, I just don't like being called that, its inaccurate, and I'd appreciate if she stopped," OP wrote.

From there, the conversation didn't get any smoother, and it was at that point the OP's wife accused him of holding onto some misogynistic resentment:

"She then told me that this must be suffering from internalized misogyny to be so uncomfortable from a name, I felt like she was making a big deal out of nothing, and told her I didn't care about my 'internalized misogyny.'"

Because he said he "didn't care" that his wife called him an "a------" for "dismissing her concerns," he wanted to know if he was in the wrong during their squabble.

It doesn't seem like he thinks he is: "My wife called me an a------ for dismissing her concerns and told me 'I don't care' isn't an acceptable response. I don't know. AITA? I just don't think its that hard to not call me a word. Do we have to psychoanalyze me over it?"

In the original post, there were several users who didn't think that OP was making that big of a request. In fact, one of the commenters thought that this was a way for his wife to "devalue" his contributions to their household: "NTA. If a husband was calling his wife a 'housewife' while she was working full time and bringing home the bacon she'd be pissed too."

"It's not about devaluing the role of managing a household, it's about devaluing your career and the work you do outside the home on top of it by implying that it doesn't count," one said.

The same person added that it seemed like OP's wife was attempting to gaslight him and manipulate the situation so she could attain some type of moral high ground: "She was being dismissive and rude, moreso when she belittled your feelings and spun it into an imaginary moral argument so she could make you the bad guy and continue to say whatever she wants regardless of whether it's hurtful."

Another person simply pointed out that she had no legs to stand on when it came to her calling him an a------ for "dismissing her concerns," writing: "It's almost as if she doesn't care about what you think."

For many people who responded to his post, it's a clear-cut case of just being nice to the person you say that you love: "She's calling you something you're not, and you've asked her to stop nicely multiple times."

Someone else speculated that she is probably just jealous of the type of lifestyle OP is able to lead given the type of lifestyle he pursued: "NTA. She seems to have escalated that quickly and unnecessarily. I wonder if she is jealous of your schedule. Internalized resentment can lead to lashing out in unexpected and often illogical ways."

Folks in the r/AmItheAngel sub were convinced that the post, however, was 100 percent fake and accused the writer of penning a "men good women bad" upload for rage views.

What do you think?