“She Is What You Raised” — Women Slam Mom Who Is Shocked Her 12-Year-Old Wants a Blowout

"Idk a blowout is the least of your problems at this point."

Mustafa Gatollari - Author
By

Published May 21 2024, 11:17 a.m. ET

Preteen Girl Asks for Blowout, Internet Says It’s Mom’s Fault
Source: TikTok | @chelseygobbo; Getty Images

A frustrated mom who hopped on TikTok to share her disbelief that her 12-year-old daughter requested a blowout may've ended up getting more than she bargained for in the comments section of her post.

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Chelsey G (@chelseygobbo) was told by by several TikTokers that she shouldn't be so gobsmacked her kid would ask to get her hair done in such a manner especially after rattling off all of the items she purchased for her kid that seem more aligned with adult interests and not something that would show up in daytime Nickelodeon commercials.

"I just took my daughter and dropped her off at youth group for the night. You guys want a little glimpse of what it's like raising a preteen in today's society?" she asks into the camera as she records from what looks like the interior of her vehicle.

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She continued, "So, we're driving there, fully decked out in her Nike sweatshirt, her Nike shirt, her Lululemon shorts, her Nike socks, her Nike tennis shoes, with her Apple Watch, and her little drink cup with her Lulu bag and she's asking me on the way there, she's like, 'Hey Mom, when do you think I could get a blowout?"

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Chelsey looks out the window briefly before looking back into the camera to give her answer to her daughter's request: "Child, I am 39 years old and I don't think I've ever had a blowout. What are you talking about?" she asks, highlighting how ridiculous she found her daughter's request.

The TikToker then went on to detail her daughter's response: "Well I just really want this blowout, I just really want my hair to like, just you know, like when I do this," she says, pantomiming the motion of her daughter running her hands through her hair.

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Preteen Daughter Asks for Blowout, Internet Says It’s Mom’s Fault: TikTok
Source: TikTok | @chelseygobbo

"I just want it to, like, flow around my face."

Chelsey wasn't having it: "Stop. Just stop. I mean, what is that? No. You cannot have a blowout. You're 12," she says before the video cuts out.

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The American Journal of Psychiatry has published numerous articles about the role social media has played in rapidly accelerating the sexualization of young girls. According to one paper, constant exposure to influencers and social media personalities who harp on their appearances, along with an obsession with filter usage and focusing on aesthetics, appear to have made young women more dead-set on rushing to emulate these behaviors.

The article reads: "While concern about sexualization of adolescent girls is not new, social media has amplified age-old pressures for teenage girls to conform to certain sexualized narratives, as well as opened up new and uncharted ways for them to do so."

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Preteen Daughter Asks for Blowout, Internet Says It’s Mom’s Fault: TikTok
Source: TikTok | @chelseygobbo

In the same piece, the author points to research conducted by "the American Psychological Association Task Force on the Sexualization of Girls detailed a number of negative effects, including decreased cognitive functioning (e.g., impaired ability to concentrate), worsened physical and mental health (e.g., eating disorders, low self-esteem, depression), unrealistic expectations about sexuality, and reductionist beliefs of women as sexual objects."

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Some have even criticized preteens as not knowing how to have fun any more, which became a topic of discussion in the comments section of this one TikTok posted by a mother who showed how elated her 9-year-old daughter was about receiving a Stanley Cup as a birthday gift.

As for Chelsey's TikTok post about her daughter's request for a blowout, numerous commenters who responded to the video said that the mother was ultimately to blame as she allowed her to adopt this "uniform" that would allow her to get to a place where she would even request a blowout: "Can you blame her?? You allow her to have an Apple Watch, Lulu and Nike everything — a blowout is pretty much a part of the uniform for them," one said.

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Preteen Daughter Asks for Blowout, Internet Says It’s Mom’s Fault: TikTok
Source: TikTok | @chelseygobbo

Another person reiterated this point, stating that parents are ultimately the ones who shape the psyche of their child and if that she didn't want her 12-year-old to have a specific type of personality, she could've done more to work with her to ensure she ended up differently: "She is what you’ve made of her. You bought her most things that adults have and you’re shocked why she’s asking for a blowout."

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Someone didn't even think the blowout was the worst of what Chelsea discussed in her video: "Lululemon shorts and she’s 12!?!?!"

The further one scrolls down the line of comments, the more it becomes clear that folks believed Mom is just reaping what she's sown: "You decked her out in $2,000 worth of stuff, and you draw the line at a $40 blowout? You deserve every bit of headache she gives you."

Preteen Daughter Asks for Blowout, Internet Says It’s Mom’s Fault: TikTok
Source: TikTok | @chelseygobbo
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One TikToker wrote they thought Chelsey was surely going to cave when it comes to the blowout: "She has all that stuff, sounds like she'll be getting a blowout to me," they said.

Another replied: "She has everything besides the blowout. I don’t blame her. She is what you raised."

There was one person, however, who decided to use their comment to share some helpful advice with Chelsey instead of maligning her parenting skills, suggesting that Chelsey use her daughter's blowout request as an opportunity for them to spend some time together: "Get her a blowout brush from Revlon or L’ange!! And some Amazon velcro rollers. Super easy and fun to learn to do at home."

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