Tucker Carlson Says Trump Is a Disappointed Dad Who Needs to Spank Kamala Harris

It appears that the Republican party is probably not going to beat the "weird" allegations due to a strange rant from ex-Fox News host Tucker Carlson. While warming up the stage for Trump at a rally in Duluth, Ga., Tucker first insulted Kamala Harris by claiming she has no skills. He stated that Kamala couldn't change the tire on a truck, much less drive it. To be clear, changing the tire on a truck is not usually a prerequisite to being President of the United States, but we digress.

The wheels continue to fall off the wagon as a histrionic Tucker said not only is it offensive that Kamala is running for president, but she is spending most of her time lecturing the American people. Things took a decidedly more ridiculous turn as Tucker launched into what we are calling his spanking speech. To no one's surprise, Trump is the corporal punishment-loving dad in this wild metaphor. Keep reading for more details.

It's very unclear what Tucker was accusing Kamala of doing. He mentioned people letting her get away with things, but we have no idea what "things" he was referring to. This confusing assertion was primarily used as an introduction to Tucker calling former President Donald Trump a dad who needs to dole out punishments. "If you allow people to get away with things that are completely over-the-top and outrageous," said Tucker, then it's like letting your children get away with things.

According to Tucker, examples of this behavior include but are not limited to allowing your 2-year-old to smear feces on the wall of your living room, letting your 14-year-old "light a joint at the breakfast table," and allowing your "hormone-addled 15-year-old daughter to slam the door of her bedroom," while giving you the finger. If you do nothing in those moments, they will continue to happen.

"There has to be a point at which dad comes home," said Tucker. Loud cheering erupted from the crowd as they began to see where this was going. "Yeah, that's right," declared an emboldened Tucker, "Dad comes home, and he's pissed." If we took what Tucker said literally, it's a pretty revealing opinion on how parenting works. The actions of those fake children shouldn't enrage a person, and yet Tucker was furious.

Don't worry, Tucker assured the crowd that Dad still "loves us." He was angry but "these are his children. They live in his house." And that right there is the problem. The house in question is America, and it does not belong to the President of the United States. Tucker said "Dad" is very disappointed and is going to send his children to their room. This is not all Dad was going to do.

"When Dad gets home, do you know what he says," asked Tucker. "You've been a bad girl. You're getting a vigorous spanking right now." The word "vigorous" really stands out here, until Tucker revealed that this "wouldn't hurt me more than it hurts you." While smiling and shaking his head no, Tucker said, "I'm not going to lie, this is going to hurt you a lot more than it hurts me, and you earned this."

After rambling on about justice and how the Democratic party is filled with angry women and weak men, Tucker finally kind of tied this thing up. According to him, the Democrats need to have limits set for them, and the "bad girl" in question is Kamala Harris. Well, that was certainly an unhinged ride!