25 Valentine's Day Jokes for You and Your Kids to Share
Updated Feb. 10 2023, 4:03 p.m. ET
Feb. 14 is Valentine’s Day, and while it may be known as the most romantic day of the year, there’s more to it than just long-stemmed roses, chocolates, and fancy dinners. Studies show that laughter leads to stronger, longer-lasting love. And with Valentine’s Day just around the corner, it’s time to gather up some sweet, wholesome jokes to share with your kids (or chuckle to all by yourself).
Whether your child is madly in love with their first-grade significant other or just waiting for all the on-sale candy you’ll bring home the day after, these Valentine’s Day jokes for kids are sure to put a smile on their little faces.
In the tradition of corny, flirty jokes, here are some family-friendly puns and one-liners that are bound to get a laugh from your kids. After all, love that makes you laugh is the best kind!
Here are some of our Favorite Valentine's Day jokes for kids:
1. Q: Why did the rooster cross the road?
A: He wanted to impress the chicks!
2. Q: How did the telephone propose to his girlfriend?
A: He gave her a ring!
3. Q: What did the volcano say to its true love?
A: I lava you!
4. Q: What did the horse eat on February 14?
A: Valentine's hay.
5. Are you a triangle? Because you sure are acute!
6. Q: What do ghosts say to one another to show that they care?
A: "I love BOO!"
7. —Knock, knock.
—Who's there?
—Peas.
—Peas, who?
—Peas be my Valentine!
8. Q: What did the cucumber say to the pickle?
A: You mean a great dill to me.
9. Q: What does a vampire call his sweetheart?
A: His ghoul-friend.
10. Q: Where do burgers take their Valentine's Day dates to dance?
A: To the meatball.
11. Q: What did the stamp say to the envelope on Valentine's Day?
A: I'm stuck on you.
12. Q: What did the boy octopus say to the girl octopus?
A: Can I hold your hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand?
13. Q: What did the lightbulb say to the switch?
A: You turn me on.
14. Q: What did the paper clip say to the magnet?
A: I find you very attractive.
15. Q: What kind of Valentine's Day candy is never on time?
A: ChocoLATE.
16. —Knock, knock.
—Who's there?
—Al.
—Al, who?
—Al be your Valentine if you'll be mine!
17. Q: What kind of flower do you never give on Valentine's Day?
A: Cauliflower.
18. Q: What do you call two birds in love?
A: Tweethearts!
19. Q: What did the bee say to its crush on Valentine's Day?
A: I love bee-ing with you, honey.
20. Q: What do farmers give their wives on Valentine's Day?
A: Hogs and kisses!
21. Q: What do you call a very small Valentine?
A: A Valentiny!
22. Q: Do skunks celebrate Valentine's Day?
A: Yes, because they're very scent-imental!
23. Q: What did the rabbit say to his girlfriend on Valentine's Day?
A: "Somebunny loves you!"
24. Q: What do you write in a slug's Valentine's Day card?
A: "Be my Valen-slime!"
25. —Knock, knock.
—Who's there?
—Olive.
—Olive, who?
—Olive you.