25 Valentine's Day Jokes for You and Your Kids to Share

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Updated Feb. 10 2023, 4:03 p.m. ET

Valentine's Day Jokes for Kids
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Feb. 14 is Valentine’s Day, and while it may be known as the most romantic day of the year, there’s more to it than just long-stemmed roses, chocolates, and fancy dinners. Studies show that laughter leads to stronger, longer-lasting love. And with Valentine’s Day just around the corner, it’s time to gather up some sweet, wholesome jokes to share with your kids (or chuckle to all by yourself).

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Whether your child is madly in love with their first-grade significant other or just waiting for all the on-sale candy you’ll bring home the day after, these Valentine’s Day jokes for kids are sure to put a smile on their little faces.

In the tradition of corny, flirty jokes, here are some family-friendly puns and one-liners that are bound to get a laugh from your kids. After all, love that makes you laugh is the best kind!

Valentine's Day
Source: Getty Images
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Here are some of our Favorite Valentine's Day jokes for kids:

1. Q: Why did the rooster cross the road?
A: He wanted to impress the chicks!

2. Q: How did the telephone propose to his girlfriend?
A: He gave her a ring!

3. Q: What did the volcano say to its true love?
A: I lava you!

4. Q: What did the horse eat on February 14?
A: Valentine's hay.

5. Are you a triangle? Because you sure are acute!

6. Q: What do ghosts say to one another to show that they care?
A: "I love BOO!"

7. —Knock, knock.
—Who's there?
—Peas.
—Peas, who?
—Peas be my Valentine!

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8. Q: What did the cucumber say to the pickle?
A: You mean a great dill to me.

9. Q: What does a vampire call his sweetheart?
A: His ghoul-friend.

10. Q: Where do burgers take their Valentine's Day dates to dance?
A: To the meatball.

Valentine's Day
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11. Q: What did the stamp say to the envelope on Valentine's Day?
A: I'm stuck on you.

12. Q: What did the boy octopus say to the girl octopus?
A: Can I hold your hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand?

13. Q: What did the lightbulb say to the switch?
A: You turn me on.

14. Q: What did the paper clip say to the magnet?
A: I find you very attractive.

15. Q: What kind of Valentine's Day candy is never on time?
A: ChocoLATE.

16. —Knock, knock.
—Who's there?
—Al.
—Al, who?
—Al be your Valentine if you'll be mine!

17. Q: What kind of flower do you never give on Valentine's Day?
A: Cauliflower.

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18. Q: What do you call two birds in love?
A: Tweethearts!

19. Q: What did the bee say to its crush on Valentine's Day?
A: I love bee-ing with you, honey.

20. Q: What do farmers give their wives on Valentine's Day?
A: Hogs and kisses!

21. Q: What do you call a very small Valentine?
A: A Valentiny!

22. Q: Do skunks celebrate Valentine's Day?
A: Yes, because they're very scent-imental!

23. Q: What did the rabbit say to his girlfriend on Valentine's Day?
A: "Somebunny loves you!"

24. Q: What do you write in a slug's Valentine's Day card?
A: "Be my Valen-slime!"

25. —Knock, knock.
—Who's there?
—Olive.
—Olive, who?
—Olive you.

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