Guilt-Ridden Mom Can’t Get Over “Death Certificate” That Came with Wagyu Beef Purchase
Published Dec. 13 2023, 4:08 p.m. ET
A mom recorded her heartbreak in real time as she read over the "death certificate" that came with some Wagyu beef she purchased for her son for his birthday.
The wedding officiant and "amateur zookeeper" who posts under the TikTok handle @mamaownby said that she felt like she was "going to hell" in a viral clip she uploaded onto the app that garnered a whopping 7.1 million views.
"Homer, it's a baby," the TikToker can be heard saying off camera as they record another woman sitting at a kitchen countertop laughing. A young man can be seen standing in another portion of the kitchen in the clip as the person behind the camera begins narrating about the "death certificate" that came with her son's Wagyu beef.
The cost of this highly esteemed breed of can reach exorbitant heights, which is probably why there are businesses that go out of their way to tout the authenticity of this beef. Costco shoppers can save themselves a few bucks if they'd like to try Wagyu for themselves, but it's still not what you'd call "cheap" — just take a look at this 4-pack of steaks totaling around 3 lbs that comes out to about $380.
Other retailers charge shoppers even more than that, so maybe butchers who are selling strips of Wagyu for such high premiums want customers to feel like they're getting a bit more out of their purchase, hence the "death certificate" that @mamaownby can't seem to stop laughing about.
"Y'all look at the certificate of authenticity," she says, pointing her camera lens to the sheet of paper posted on the kitchen refrigerator. The document contains information on the birthday and slaughter date of the cow. The breed that the cow was, the total weight of the cow that the cut of meat was taken from along with the region in which the bovine was born and raised in.
Here's what the document looked like:
- Carcass No. 872
- Carcass Weight 562 KG
- Grading A5
- BMS NO. 10
- Harvest Date 08/22/2023
- Fabrication Date 08/26/2023
- Cattle ID NO. 1632410397
- Breed Japanese Black
- Birthday 01/31/2021
- Age At Harvest 30 Months
- Cattle Origin Hokkaido
"We got Wagyu beef for my son for his birthday, okay? That's all he asked for. It tells you the carcass number, the weight, it was 30 months old at Harvest?! She asks."
As she explicates on about the details of the death certificate for the cut of Wagyu beef, it's evident that she's using her hand to cover up a part of the sheet, and when she finally removes her hand, she reveals what she's been covering up this whole time: "Okay but then look at this they booped its nose!"
Just like a footprint or handprint for a baby who is born, the "murder certificate" of the cow contains a little piece of ink that appears to be the cow's nose meant to solidify its identity, similar to how a human being would have a birth certificate of their own.
"It's a murder certificate!" the TikToker exclaims as they continue to record the "certificate of authenticity" sheet for the Wagyu beef that her son requested for his birthday, "Murder oh God! I'm going to Hell," she mutters as the clip ends.
She added in a caption for the video that she didn't feel too good seeing the certificate that came with her son's Wagyu beef purchase, writing: "I feel like a huge a-----. Why would they DO that?
Some commenters who saw the video speculated that they thought despite @mamownby's protestations that the meat probably tasted delicious, and she showed off her son's culinary handiwork in a follow-up clip where he presented what appeared to be a perfectly cooked chunk of Wagyu that looked tantamount to something you'd get in a high-end restaurant for an eye-bulgingly high price.
Have you ever tried Wagyu beef? Would seeing a specialized certificate that added more personality and character to the cow that you're eating make you think twice about chomping down on the flesh of a fellow mammal?
