15 Absurd Headlines That Should Not Have Happened This Week, June 17th 2017
Updated Nov. 18 2019, 2:15 p.m. ET
The truth isn't always stranger than fiction but in these cases, it totally is.
1. Fox News Was Attacking Barack Obama For Using Dijon Mustard At This Point In His Presidency
Remember when this was the biggest scandal our President could get involved in?
2. After finding his doppelganger, Kansas City man is freed from prison
Well I'll be damned, it really was the evil twin.
3. Author eats his own book live on air after betting against Corbyn
"And let it be known I never back down from a bet! Unrelated: does anybody have any water?"
4. Plane hits gator on Orlando airport runway. Plane wins.
Damn, I really had my money on the gator for this one.
5. Suspect allegedly shot man with shotgun shell filled with cereal
Must...resist...cereal...killer...joke...
6. Disneyland guests smeared by massive dump of geese droppings
What a crappy vacation.
7. Woman says pricey vitamin bottle from Shoppers Drug Mart was filled with dried pasta
I wonder what the nutritional benefits of pasta extract are?
8. Sydney gig shut down because band had too many members
That venue must really hate K-Pop acts, then.
9. AI 'good for the world'... says ultra-lifelike robot
Of course you would think that, terror bot. Of course you would.
10. It's now legal to challenge someone to a duel in Canada
First Trudeau, now this...if Canada do somehow make their winters not so brutal, I might move up there.
11. Saudi ad censors woman, replaces her with inflatable ball
Marketers really need to cool it with these unrealistic body expectations of women.
12. Newsweek’s Kurt Eichenwald was just looking at tentacle porn for his family
The kids wanted to know about octopuses the man was just doing his research.
13. Sadomasochist swingers club with torture dungeon shutdown over health and safety concerns
What? No way!
14. Duchess of Cornwall 'knights farmer' with leek
Sir Davos!
15. Madrid bans 'manspreading' on buses
Finally, something is being done about this horrible epidemic.
