People Share the Biggest Lies They Told for Personal Gain

Mustafa Gatollari - Author
By

Updated Jan. 10 2019, 3:14 p.m. ET

liar liar cover
Source: universal pictures

As kids, we're always told cheaters never prosper. And it's true that, in the grand scheme of things, people who get things the easy way are usually never really happy with the results because we're the kind of animals who thrive when they've earned something. Those are the rules, I don't make them, but just look at at the lives of most people who lie, cheat, and steal their ways to success.

Now, that doesn't mean you can't steal to get a bunch of money and then actually work to build something great with it. Nor does it mean cheaters don't prosper on a surface level: many people profit monetarily from their lies.

Like a good crime movie, the key is to only selectively lie,  have good intentions, or quit while you're ahead, like most of these people did. Some of their lies were pretty darn brilliant and ended up being OK in the end, if you're the "ends justify the means" type. Others told fibs that were kinda useless, but also downright hilarious.

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It all started when Nicole Cliffe shared the story of how she moved in with her significant other.

lies personal gain twitter
Source: twitter

A little while lie ended up having some pretty great results.

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Then she told the most college lie of all time.

lies personal gain twitter
Source: twitter

Works every time.

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Taking advantage of the church.

lies personal gain twitter
Source: twitter

At least they didn't go see Marilyn Manson.

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69 Big Macs?!

lies personal gain twitter
Source: twitter

In her defense, Jordache jeans are great.

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Monica Lewinsky told this super believable lie.

lies personal gain twitter
Source: twitter

ONJ over for dinner? I want in!

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The weirdest way to steal a jacket, ever.

lies personal gain twitter
Source: twitter

Why would you want to go around wearing someone else's monogrammed jacket anyway?

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lies personal gain twitter
Source: twitter

That'd be a weird flex to lie about.

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The man came clean.

lies personal gain twitter
Source: twitter

No please, keep it hush so all of his careers are protected.

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Money DOES grow on trees.

lies personal gain twitter
Source: twitter

The dimes/pennies trick is something every older sibling did, I think.

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This is brilliant.

lies personal gain twitter
Source: twitter

I hope he used the key to pull off the ultimate senior prank.

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Those CPR dummies are creepy.

lies personal gain twitter
Source: twitter

I can't blame him.

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Are Denny's french fries even good?

lies personal gain twitter
Source: twitter

Whatever, free is free, I guess.

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LEGEND.

lies personal gain twitter
Source: twitter

ABSOLUTE LEGEND.

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This quick-thinking genius.

lies personal gain twitter
Source: twitter

I wish I was this slick when I was younger.

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Fortune favors the bold.

lies personal gain twitter
Source: twitter

Especially when you're dealing with a drunk professor.

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I have a feeling he knew.

lies personal gain twitter
Source: twitter

The "accidental-text-on-purpose" never works unless the other person wants it to. Come on.

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This is brilliant.

lies personal gain twitter
Source: twitter

Traumatic, but brilliant.

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FREEDOM '90!

lies personal gain twitter
Source: twitter

Worth any subsequent punishments for sure.

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Who doesn't know what a donut is?

lies personal gain twitter
Source: twitter

This is the best kind of senseless joke.

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Transition confusion.

lies personal gain twitter
Source: twitter

Technically telling the truth...

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I don't blame them.

lies personal gain twitter
Source: twitter

Breaking Bad is certainly worth a couple more weeks of misery in a relationship that wasn't working.

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Pro moves.

lies personal gain twitter
Source: twitter

Probably have to cycle through restaurants. Works best if you're shameless.

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First: I'm jealous of kids who had an allowance.

lies personal gain twitter
Source: twitter

Second: piggy bank theft is a serious crime.

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This is how people die of poison ivy, Mathew.

lies personal gain twitter
Source: twitter

You should be ashamed of yourself.

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I can't believe this worked.

lies personal gain twitter
Source: twitter

Justin needs to go to Vegas or play the lottery immediately because he's the luckiest man alive.

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Other homework tomfoolery.

lies personal gain twitter
Source: twitter

Now this story I totally believe would work.

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Wait, what?

lies personal gain twitter
Source: twitter

The medical examiner from Brooklyn Nine-Nine is real?

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I think Harriet is great overestimating men here.

lies personal gain twitter
Source: twitter

I'd argue that most men would still sleep with women even if they found them utterly un-charming.

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Sam shows a bully that perception matters.

lies personal gain twitter
Source: twitter

It matters a lot.

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Those are really good friends.

lies personal gain twitter
Source: twitter

Imagine she showed up in Boston one day, though?

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Bonus points for involving a stranger.

lies personal gain twitter
Source: twitter

It's always better when you make yourself look like a good Samaritan in the process.

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I think Tracy's training was just fine.

lies personal gain twitter
Source: twitter

Unrelated: those Babysitters Club book covers were the best.

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I applaud this. My only question is...

lies personal gain twitter
Source: twitter

...why'd they settle in Nebraska, of all places?

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"You won't like it, it's gross."

lies personal gain twitter
Source: twitter

Classic. Just classic.

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Lesley, I'm impressed.

lies personal gain twitter
Source: twitter

I hope she had friends with her at the time though, 16 on your own at Spring Break must've been wild.

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Dorms suck.

lies personal gain twitter
Source: twitter

So I totally get it.

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